Does being a good person mean letting others walk all over you?
WATCH
Fruit of the Root, 5 of 8 from July 5, 2026
“God’s unbelievable kindness reshapes our belief to make us kind.”
Galatians 5 & Titus 3 by Michael Lockstampfor (@miklocks)
SUMMARY
This sermon teaches that Biblical kindness is an active, Spirit-produced way of moving toward others to serve them, flowing out of a deep awareness of God’s overwhelming kindness to us in Christ when we were still selfish and enslaved to sin. Pastor Michael calls believers to let this kindness reshape their lives—showing love, setting healthy boundaries without becoming doormats or divisive—and to see such transformed kindness as evidence of the Holy Spirit’s work, not their own effort.
REFLECTION & DISCUSSION QUESTIONS
💬 Is it kindness or unkindness that characterizes our lives?
💬 How do we stay focused on God's kindness?
💬 Where do we need to establish or hold kind boundaries with others?
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Well, good morning again, church. As we have been going through this summer, we've kind of stopped and have made our camp in Galatians, chapter five. There's a little list in that chapter that talks about the difference between living out of my default settings, living out of my flesh, and the way that, like, I instinctually do things, and the things that happen when I, like, surrender my default settings to Jesus and let him give me, do a factory reset on my heart and let him put his settings in. So the two lists that are there are the works of the flesh and the fruit of the spirit. And so we've just camped out there in that list.
There's seven or so. I can't remember. I've got nine weeks here. So maybe there's nine of those things that are listed as fruit of the Spirit. And we have been going through now for four weeks.
This will be week five. But the verses say this. They said the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self control. I just counted on my fingers, like, right at 10. I think against these things, there is no law.
Like, doesn't matter what culture you go to, doesn't matter what society you're part of. Like, these things are godly things. There are things that we know inherently to be good, but we also know inherently they're not things that come naturally to us. I was listening to Pastor Ben in Neighborhood church in Sebring preach last week, and he was like, good morning, everybody. We got a sermon on patience this morning.
We. Which is the sermon that nobody wants to hear. And everybody's like, yeah, I guess you're kind of right. I never thought about. I didn't want to hear that.
He said, and if it makes you feel any better, there's no pastor that wants to preach a sermon on patience either. And yet here we are doing that. So we saw as we started off, we saw that we grow in love as we walk in God's spirit. Like, there's something about understanding the Biblical definition of love of, like, a loyal selflessness that is different from our culture's definition of love. But as we, like, walk in God's spirit, he grows in us a selflessness and a loyalty to the best interest of other people that's really unnatural to us.
So as we walk with God's spirit, he grows that love in us, and he grows our joy as we focus our attention on his glory and on his work. So as we look at who God is and what God's done, we may initially have some reservations. The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom. But as we, like, really gaze at the work that God is doing in the world, we realize that he is working in love for our good and that grows our joy. Like, the way that we look at the world, the way that we approach our world ends up being joyful, not happy all the time.
Not just a plastic smile, but a joyful confidence that God's in control. He sees what I need and he's going to intervene. Like, he's going to show up and take care of what's what I need. Then we saw that Jesus makes peace between our God and our neighbors. So if there's any peace to be had in the world, like, it's Jesus that makes it.
And he makes peace between us and God. And then that peace that we have, like, as we come to peace with God, he grows that peace with other people that we're in community with and in fellowship with. And then last week, you know, the sermon that nobody wanted to hear is that Jesus takes all the time he needs to grow all the life he plans, that Jesus is patient, he's willing to wait for you to catch up to him, and he takes all the time that he needs to grow the life that he has plans. He's not in a hurry to make things happen. And in fact, he's willing to wait for things to be done right over to get them done as quick as possible.
So he's better than me at that most of the time. This morning we're talking about kindness, which feels like, okay, cool, like, that's a pretty vanilla topic. Like, who is like, offended? Like, we're going to. We went to church this morning and we're going to talk about kindness like, like, nobody is storming out.
I don't have to give any PG13 ratings. About, like a heads up. Like, the sermon is going to get a little crazy. We're talking about kindness today. It's just like, okay, cool, like, super vanilla.
However, I'm hoping that as we look at this text in Titus chapter three this morning, that we'll see that kindness is like incredibly, if not offensive. It pushes against most of what comes natural to us. It pushes against most of the things that I think we would assume for ourselves. So I think it will be challenging. But I'll ask you as we start, if you would pray with me.
It's our habit as neighborhood church to pray. The disciples prayer, it's just a model of prayer that Jesus gave for us to kind of align our hearts to God's will. And so I've got the words here on the screen. If you're unfamiliar with this translation, it's just out of the English standard, out of. Out of Matthew, chapter six.
I can't read it. Why can't I read it? Matthew, chapter six. I'm getting old, y'. All.
I can't hear things anymore. I'm, like, looking at that, going, I can't. Nope, it's too small. So maybe I need to go visit the eye doctor. Let's pray, and then we'll take a look at the text this morning.
Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name. Your kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread, and forgive us our debts as we also have forgiven our debtors. Lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. For yours is the kingdom and the power and the glory forever.
Amen. Would you navigate with me to the Book of Titus, Chapter 3? Chapter 3 is the last chapter in the Book of Titus. Very small, probably only covers a page or two in your Bibles, if you want to follow along in the blue Bibles, it's on page 1148. So that's what I'm looking at.
And so if you want to follow along with me, 1148 in the blue Bibles, the book of Titus, chapter three. This is a real small letter, and it's a letter that was written by Paul, who's the same guy who wrote Galatians. He was a church planter, a missionary, an apostle, and he was a pastor. And one of the things that astonishes me is as I look at the biography of Paul's work, is that whenever Paul is doing something for the Lord, he's never doing it alone. Like, every time he writes about this is what.
Like there's never. I don't know. I have to go back and look. But we're going to look at Acts in the fall, and we'll have to pay attention. If there's ever a time where Paul talks about what I did in a city, he always talks about what we did together in a city.
And he always has some guys that he is training, that he is bringing up, that he's discipling. And one of the guys that he disciples is a guy named Titus. Titus is a Greek. So he didn't grow up reading the Old Testament. He didn't grow up in a Jewish background.
He's somebody who came to the Lord as a Gentile. And as such, Paul sends Titus to a little island in the Mediterranean called Crete. And Crete is kind of an island unto itself, and their reputation is kind of sour. There's a part in the beginning part of this letter where Paul quotes a Cretan poet. So somebody who's from Crete who writes poetry says of the Cretans, people who live on this island, all Cretians, are lazy and gluttons.
They just live for themselves and their own desires. So I'm super grateful this morning that that's an ancient problem that we don't have to deal with. There's no selfishness in modern America that we have to contend with. And so we're going to have to work really hard to figure out how to apply these verses to our lives today. But I think we'll be able to do it.
We're going to do. We're going to do chapter three. I want to read chapter three. But before we do, if you've got a paper Bible, just look at that last verse in chapter two. Declare these things.
Exhort and rebuke with all authority. Let no one disregard you. So as Paul is writing this letter to this young pastor in Crete, Titus, he says, hey, these are the things that you need to teach. These are the things that you need to instruct people in and do it in a way that they cannot ignore you. Right?
So I just show you that verse because it gives me confidence to read the rest of the letter. Right, let's read. In chapter three, it says this. Remind them to be submissive to rulers and authorities, to be obedient, to be ready for every good work, to speak evil of no one, to avoid quarreling, to be gentle, and to show perfect courtesy toward all people. For we ourselves were once foolish, disobedient, led astray slaves to various passions and pleasures, passing our days in malice and envy, hated by others and hating one another.
But when the goodness and loving kindness of God our Savior appeared, he saved us not because of works done by us in righteousness, but according to his own mercy, by the washing of regeneration and renewal of the Holy Spirit, whom He poured out on us richly through Jesus Christ our Savior, so that, being justified by his grace, we might become heirs according to the hope of eternal life. The saying is trustworthy. And I want you to insist on these things so that those who have believed in God may be careful to devote themselves to good works, things that are excellent and profitable for people. But avoid foolish controversies, genealogies, dissensions, and quarrels about the law, for they are unprofitable and worthless as For a person who stirs up division after warning him once and then twice, have nothing more to do with him, knowing that such a person is warped and sinful, he is self condemned. Let's pause there.
So as he's closing this letter, very brief letter to Titus, this pastor in Crete. He says, there's a couple of things that I want to make sure that you are making sure that the congregation knows. Teach these things and make sure that everybody's on the same page. Here's some to dos. Have you ever come to the scripture and you're like, I wish you'd just tell me how to live my life.
Just tell me what to do, and I'll go and do it. Here is a place where you just have a list, right? Remind them to be submissive to rulers and authorities. Hold on a second. I want a different list.
Every teenager was like, are you kidding me right now? What do you mean, be submissive to rulers and authorities? I gotta obey my parents. I gotta listen to my teachers. Let's just take this verse out.
We're just gonna edit this one. Remind them to be submissive to rulers and authorities, to be obedient, to be ready for every good work. To speak evil of no one. Hold on. To speak evil of no one.
What about that one guy?
He kind of deserves people speaking evil about him. Don't you know what I mean? Mm, yep. Oh, no, no, no, no. That's not what it says.
It says, speak evil of no one. Do you know who's included in no one? Everybody. There's this thing that happens in our house. There's this guy who lives in our house.
I don't know if he lives in your house, but he lives in my house called Not Me. Have y' all heard of Not Me? Oh, man, I cannot get along with Not Me. It doesn't matter what happens or hasn't happened yet. It is not me who is responsible.
Right here. Say, speak evil of no one to avoid quarreling, to be gentle, and to show perfect courtesy toward all people. For we ourselves were once foolish, disobedient, led astray, slaves to various passions and pleasures, passing our days in malice and envy, hated by others and hating one another. There's this. There's contrast here, right?
He gives them this picture of talk to the church and tell the church that this is kind of what their life should be characterized by. Submissiveness to authority, obedience, good work, not trash talking. People avoiding quarreling, being gentle and courteous. Like that idea of courteous is our word for kindness in Galatians, the English standard is just translated that word to be different. But that's our idea of kindness.
Being courteous towards other people, like the church should be defined by behaviors that are described in that way. He says that is in contrast to how you used to be, because you used to be a different way. I said last week and some people wanted me, they didn't really want to fight me about it. They just don't like to hear it. That like our hearts are naturally at war with God.
Like left to our own devices, our hearts are naturally at war with God. And he describes that default setting this way. We were foolish, disobedient, led astray, slaves to various passions and pleasures, passing our days in malice and envy, hated by others and hating one another. I'm so glad this is an ancient problem because when I read it the first time I was like, that almost sounds like the comment section of like every website. Like, it's like almost.
I'm glad we've come such a long way as a society that this is not a descriptor of us hated. Our default setting is hating one another and being hated.
I don't like how that feels.
Conflict is part of living in a fallen world. Not all conflict is bad, but there is all kinds of relational drama that happens just by the nature of us being people together on the planet. And the primary issue is that I want what I want, which is not a problem if you want what I want. In fact, I think you all would be better if you wanted what I wanted. The problem is you don't want what I want.
You want what you want. And that's true of every single person that's ever lived. Have you ever met a selfless baby? Every single infant is convinced with their whole being that they are the center of the whole universe. And you better get with their program or else.
Right? That's how we start. It's not bad. I mean, it is bad, but it's like it's normal. That's how we start off.
But if we stay self centered and just focusing on ourselves, we become, what does it say, slaves to our passions and desires. It's not wrong to want things. It's wrong for your wants to be the God of your life. What you want isn't necessarily what you need. And if what you want is the only thing that matters in your life, then you are a slave to you to sin.
And slaves to sin are slaves to death and dying.
But a transformed life is a kind life.
When Jesus brings us to life, when we Say, okay, God, I see that my sin is. I see that my sin is kind of causing a problem here. It's making things difficult between me and God. And so Jesus, would you just wash away that sins? Would you wash away that stuff and just kind of get it out of the way for me so that me and God can be right?
He's like, yes, I will do that. But we don't understand the depth of the cleansing that Jesus wants to do. I think I just need.
I think that when I bring my dirty plate to the sink, I just need to like splash it with some water and then I can put it in the cabinet, right?
I'm not talking about anybody who lives in my house. I'm just saying hypothetically. Then Jesus says, I can see that you think you want a little bit of cleansing, but what you need is a deep cleaning, washing. We're gonna scrub this stuff and then we're gonna steam it and sanitize it before we dry it and then put it away. There's a whole process.
We come to Jesus for a little bit of forgiveness and he says, listen, you don't understand the depth of the wickedness of your soul. You think that you just have some relational conflicts. I think that you are slaves to your passions and ple. Passing your days in malice and envy, hated by others and hating one another. I wouldn't describe it that way, but now that you mention it, when they get that thing that's just a little bit nicer than the thing that I got last week, there is a little bit of something that happens in here.
I guess Jesus probably needs to do a little bit more work on me. Baby, we're just getting started.
I think.
I think if I knew all the sin that I would do after I trusted Jesus to forgive my sin, I don't know that I would have let. I don't know that I would have asked him to forgive me.
I know way more the depths of the sinfulness in my heart today than I did when I started trusting Jesus for salvation at 12 or 13.
And I look at his grace where I prayed a prayer, and he says he forgave me. He gave me justification like he said I was right with God. And then I just kept on sinning. I sinned bad. I was mean to people.
I was self centered. I hurt people.
I don't know that if I had known all that when I was praying that prayer that I would have let myself finish the prayer. But the more that I have grown aware of the sinfulness that has been in me from the beginning, I have been more and more floored by the mercy of God that he would offer forgiveness at all. As my understanding of my sinfulness grows, my understanding of the glory, of the mercy, of the love of Christ has grown even more. I think I'm getting into my next point. But a transformed life is a kind life.
Transformed lives serve other people in love. Remind them, don't forget, just remind them to be submissive to rulers and authorities, to be obedient, to be ready for every good work, to speak evil of no one, to avoid quarreling, to be gentle, and to show perfect courtesy toward all people.
We started everything kind of talking about how we grow in love as we walk with God's spirit. And we did that from a chapter of the Bible, First Corinthians, chapter 13, that defines what love is. It says, love is patient. Love is patient, kind. Last week we talked about patience.
Jesus takes all the time he needs to grow all the life he has planned. And love is kind where patience is like, passive in the sense of, if I'm going to be patient with you, I'm actually just going to step back, I'm going to give you some space to do what you're doing. I'm not going anywhere. I'm not running away. I'm just.
I'm patient. I'm just going to wait.
Patience is passive, and it just makes space for love. Kindness is active, which says, I'm not just waiting. I'm moving towards you, to embrace you, to serve you proactively. I'm not just going to listen. I'm also going to be ready for good work.
I'm not just going to listen. I'm actually going to avoid. When I open my mouth, I'm going to avoid speaking evil of anybody.
I'm not just going to avoid conflict, not just going to, like, let that be over there. I'm going to be. I've made some space to be a part of it, and I'm not going to fight with you about it.
Not because I got it, but because I remember where I was. I remember what life was like before Jesus.
Kindness is being a refuge for somebody else in their storm, and it often costs more than time. When we think about patience, we think about how much time it's going to cost, how long do I have to wait, how much time is it going to take? I've got to be patient for this. Oh, my gosh.
Patience often costs us time. Kindness often costs us something more. It's going to cost our resources. It's going to mean we share the gifts that God has given to us. It's not just, I'm going to give you some time to think about what you need.
I'm going to also feed you when you've been cursing me all day.
So I wonder, just as you think about your life and as you think about these verses, is it kindness or unkindness that characterizes our life, like, just generally broad sweeps? Is our life characterized by kindness towards other people or is our life characterized by an unkindness?
Michael, come on. We're people. We're all sinners. We're all sinners saved by grace. Nobody's going to do this perfectly.
What do you mean, is my life characterized by kindness? Of course I get irritable in traffic. Like, of course, of course, of course, of course, of course. I hear you. My heart tries to justify my sin too.
But look at where he takes it. Look at where he takes it in the next verse, in verse four. But when the goodness and loving kindness hesed loving kindness, that's the kindness of our Father that we'll come back to Psalm 23. But it's this covenant kindness, proactive, active love. But when the goodness and loving kindness of God our Savior appeared, he saved us not because of works done by us in righteousness, but according to his own mercy, by the washing of regeneration and renewal of the Holy Spirit, whom He poured out on us richly through Jesus Christ our Savior, so that being justified by his grace, we might become heirs according to the hope of eternal life.
He says, listen, as you're thinking about how to be submissive to authority and how to be not quarrelsome and how to be kind to people that maybe aren't kind to you. To don't forget that God sets the bar for kindness.
I don't know if they're related, but there's another person that kind of comes into our home pretty regularly with not me. And that's for no reason.
For no reason. For no reason. Da da da da da. For no reason. Well, you.
For no reason. Listen, I don't know where for no reason came from, but everybody's got a reason for whatever they're doing. Like there's no choice we've ever made that we didn't do for no reason. There was something that we thought we were accomplishing. There was some kind of reason behind it.
There are people in our lives that we can look at and be like, they were unkind to me for no reason. I didn't even do anything. That might have been the problem but they're unkind to me for no reason. If anybody, if there's anybody on the planet who has a reason to be unkind to you, it's God.
What do you have that he did not give you? I worked for everything I have. Yeah, okay. And you were one spine injury away from all that being taken care taken away from you. Yeah, well, I love these people.
Well, and I take care and I provide. Okay, sure. But you always had the skills you needed for the job that was available. Sometimes you have skills for jobs that don't exist.
Opportunities and favor from God, like they're gifts. What do we have that we didn't get from Him?
And then we take all of those things across the course of human history. We take the gifts of God and the common grace blessings that God provides for us. The weather that's favorable for an environment that works. The possibility to be able to engineer machines that make our lives go better and faster for better, for worse. Like, we take all these common grace things and we say, you know what, God, I don't really need you.
I have everything I need. And all this stuff that, that you gave me. We say, in fact, like, when you come and you try to tell me that I actually do have spiritual needs, I get angry about that. And my response is to crucify your son.
Jesus didn't come and die just to illustrate a good point. He came and died because we were willing to kill him.
If there's anybody on the planet that has a reason to be unkind to us, it's God.
But when the goodness and the loving kindness of God our Savior appeared, when he showed us what it was that he was doing behind the scenes, when he showed us how good he was, when he showed us how kind he was, when we began to understand his work in the world, when the goodness and loving kindness of God our Savior appeared, he saved us not because of works done by us in righteousness, but according to his own mercy, by the washing of regeneration, of renewal by the Holy Spirit, whom He poured out on us a little bit, whom he poured out on us just a touch so that we could get by, by the washing of regeneration and renewal of the Holy Spirit, whom He poured out on us. What does it say? Richly. Kindness often costs us more than just time. And here God's kindness caused him to pour out on us richly the blessings of the life of Jesus, whom He poured out on us richly through Jesus Christ our Savior, so that being justified, accepted by God by His grace, we might become heirs according to the Hope of eternal life.
Not only has he been kind to us in the past, not only is his kindness preserving our ability to, like, be alive at the moment, but he says, all of my kindness is not done yet. I got so much more. Honey, we're just getting started. You think you need all this stuff to kind of make you feel normal, and I'm telling you that this stuff is killing you and you won't let go of it. But, honey, we're working on it.
We're making progress. We're taking steps, because where we're going is better. I'm not done. According to the. By the washing of regeneration and the renewal of the Holy Spirit, whom he poured out on us richly through Christ Jesus our Savior, so that being justified by his grace, we might become in the future heirs of an inheritance that is not yet here and not yet complete according to the hope of eternal life.
But if there's anybody who has a reason to be unkind, it would be God.
And he says, my son, my daughter, I. I have been kind to you because that is who I am. I am being kind to you because I continue to be me. And I will be kind to you as far as you will let me in, because that's how I will always be.
How do we stay focused on God's kindness?
When we start to talk about kindness, even here in the beginning verses here, like, our default is to begin to look at one another, be like, well, I'm definitely kinder than that guy. Gonna pass the test, right? Or we look at them like, man, they were not kind to me, and so I'm justified in being unkind back to them. They earned it. They earned my unkindness.
Neener, neener, neener.
But I don't know that we have a hope to be kind to one another if we just have our eyes locked on one another. He says, remember all these things, but more importantly, don't forget God's kindness. So how do we stay focused on God's kindness?
Like, you're here on Sunday. I think that's a great thing. Like, on days where I'm feeling pretty pessimistic about stuff, I'm like, why does anybody show up to listen to some bald guy talk for 45 minutes about some book that they could just read by themselves? You wanted to read it, you could read it, and you would if you wanted to. But if you don't want to read it, then what does it matter if I read it to you?
That's where my head goes.
And yet there's Something that he does here together, when we're reading it together that is different from when we're reading it by ourselves. And that habit of being together actually stops you from being everywhere else in the world.
There's probably 150 fishing boats that have driven past this building this morning.
I'm not saying fishing is bad. I'm saying if your habit is just fishing and just time alone with the Lord out on the water, which is fine, I'd encourage you. I'd just ask, did you have a Bible on the boat? Because I've never known the Holy Spirit to speak very clearly if he wasn't speaking through His Word.
Having this habit at least once a week is getting you out of being wherever else you would be if you weren't here. And that's good. I don't know if you know this, and some of you might not know it at all yet, but there's people in this room who love you. There's a lot of them. There's a lot more than you think.
They don't know me.
They don't have to know you to love you. And they would love you more if you'd let them know you more.
But it's more than Sunday. I hope you know. I hope. Please know that it's more than Sunday. I tell you every week, it's more than Sunday.
Have you noticed that we get to the end of this time and I'm like, hey, by the way, don't forget Jesus. Jesus doesn't just live in this box. Like, take him home with you, follow him outside of this room, meet with him in His Word outside of here. You can do that privately and you can read the Bible together outside of here. Like, I don't really like all those weird guys.
Like, I sit on the left side of the sanctuary. I don't want to talk to those right side people over there. Right. Okay, well, get some left side people. Read the scripture together.
Right? You don't have to include everybody. It's okay to be, to be a smaller group of people. As long as we're following Jesus together. How, how do we focus on God's kindness?
The thing is we leave this room and we just, we, we don't think about. It's not that we do it on purpose. I don't think we do it on purpose. We just don't think about the influences that we allow to be cranked up to 11. Do you know that the enemy and the world system wants us to be distracted from anything good?
You know that they like push things that are violent on purpose. They know you want. They want you to be afraid of whatever news it is, whether you actually have a legitimate reason to be concerned or not. And there's times where we don't mean to. We just walk out of here.
We just let whatever happens to come come. And then we get three days in and we're like, why am I so anxious? Why isn't God helping me? He's like, how are we staying focused on his kindness? How are we reminding ourselves that God is good and gracious and kind?
If you go seven days between reminders, maybe it would be helpful to build in some more reminders. Maybe it would be helpful to, like, turn the phone off until you've had a little bit of time to read the word.
They made these things called alarm clocks a long time ago. They still sell them. And you don't even need the phone for an alarm clock. I know they do everything, but they only do what we let them do. And if we let them, they will be the default setting for everything that they can do.
Because that's how they're designed. They're designed to get and hold your attention. So if you know that, how do you make sure that you make the choice that you're staying focused on God's kindness?
Because on a Tuesday morning, I need to know that when the goodness and loving kindness of God our Savior appeared, he saved us not because of works done by us in righteousness, but according to his own mercy, by the washing of regeneration and renewal of the Holy Spirit, by the cleansing that he does in our souls, whom he poured out on us richly through Jesus Christ, our Savior, his death, his burial, his resurrection. He's not just some old dead philosopher. Like, he's alive so that being justified by his grace, we might become heirs according to hope and eternal life.
There's a verse in the Book of Romans, another letter that Paul wrote. Do I have it here? I think I've got it there. Or do you presume he's talking to people who, like, know the right answer, that God's good, God's kind, all that kind of stuff, and yet they still live as though those things aren't true? Or do you presume on the riches of his kindness and forbearance and patience, not knowing that God's kindness is meant to lead you to repentance?
He's talking there to people who, like, know the church answer, that are not offended by this vanilla sermon on kindness and yet still are unkind to people. They still are unhealthily. Judgmental, and they hold people to standards that they don't keep themselves. That's who he's talking to there. He says, you know about God's kindness, but are you just counting on God's kindness, knowing that he's going to continue to be kind, continue to be kind, to continue to be kind, ignoring the fact that his kindness is designed to lead you to have a different life, to lead you to repentance, because a transformed life is a kind life, and God sets the bar for our kindness.
Here's the big idea. God's unbelievable kindness reshapes our belief to make us kind.
I don't think he's just waiting. I don't think he just wants us to hear this and be like, oh yeah, I got to go do a random act of kindness this week because the bald guy was grumpy again on Sunday.
The work that Jesus wants to do is to shape how you think about the world that you live in, to change your belief so that you become a person who exudes his kindness.
God's kindness, I think, is unbelievable. Like when I think about it, it's really hard for me to wrap my head and my arms and my heart around. He'd be kind to me, that he would be forgiving to me when I would take that forgiveness and then use it to beat other people with. Or use that kindness and that forgiveness as a license to do egregious sins, because I can ask for forgiveness later.
But God's unbelievable kindness reshapes our belief to make us.
In Titus chapter 3 and verse 8, he closes with this. He says, the saying is trustworthy, you can depend on it. And I want you to insist on these things so that those who have believed in God may be careful to devote themselves to good works. These are excellent and profitable for people. But avoid foolish controversies, genealogies, dissensions and quarrels about the law, for they're unprofitable and worthless.
As for a person who stirs up division after warning him once and then twice, have nothing more to do with him knowing that such a person is warped and sinful, he is self condemned.
As he's talking about God's kindness, we can kind of lean into this. I'll call it. I guess I'll borrow that term vanilla Christianity, where I just have to be nice to everybody. As long as I give everybody a hug and don't tell them anything that's true and let them believe whatever they want to believe. As long as I'm nice, then I can get along.
And I can represent Jesus by just going with the flow. And here he says, listen, as you are kind, as you are devoting yourself to good works, as you're devoting yourself to. To think about kindness, as you're fixated on God's unbelievable kindness, he says, as you're working on that, there's going to be people who aren't willing to cooperate, and you're going to have to set up a boundary. You're going to have to. As people continue to want to fight you and you continue to not be willing to fight and quarrel, you're going to have to set a boundary.
Loving your neighbor and being kind to others doesn't mean that we simply become doormats and let people do whatever they want and say whatever they want. There's times where we have to say, I'm not going to stand around while you're doing that. I'm not going to participate with you while that's where you're at.
And I'll just remind you where we started. At the end of chapter two, he says, I should declare these things. Exhort and rebuke with all authority. Let no one disregard you. That kindness, also active kindness, includes holding and keeping boundaries.
That's the wrong thing. I didn't put it in there. There's a fence, though. That's a boundary.
Your blanks are active kindness includes holding boundaries. Active kindness includes holding boundaries.
Our beliefs direct our behavior. I believe that God is kind. I believe that he is making me to be like Him. And so I believe that God is making me kind. But I also remember that God's kindness is meant to lead to repentance.
And that kindness, like, has a point where we're kind of done with the suffering. Like, that thing comes first, I'm going to be patient with you, and then I'm going to be kind with you. And there comes a point where we're kind of done with the patience and the kindness. And if you're continuing to reject what it is that God is trying to lead you towards, then I think we're just done.
But avoid. So avoid foolish controversies, genealogies, dissensions, and quarrels about the law. Why? Because they're unprofitable and worthless. You're just wasting time.
It's not going to build anybody up for you to nitpick and argue about those things. So just don't do it. It's okay to say, I'm not willing to have this conversation.
But as for a person who stirs up division after warning him once and then twice have nothing more to do with him knowing that that person is warped and sinful. He's self condemned. Modern wisdom. So this is like what your neighbors think is you should just cut toxic people out of your life. That's how we say it, right?
Have you heard that before? Just cut out the toxic people. Right? Ancient wisdom reminds us that we should not assume that everyone is toxic. Just because somebody says or does something that I don't like doesn't mean that they are toxic to me.
Don't assume that everybody is toxic. But then two, don't neglect to give a warning.
Sometimes we walk into a situation, we see, oh, this is their controversy. Genealogy, dissensions, quarrels about the law. People are just being unprofitable by. And we just remove ourselves.
We don't say, hey, is this conversation actually helpful? Are we encouraging one? Are we building one another up? Just ask the question. Just asking the question.
Is this profitable? Because it doesn't sound, it sounds to me like we're arguing a lot, we're talking a lot and we're not actually coming to any understanding and we're not actually like being sent out by the Holy Spirit by this controversy. So we can, we can argue all day if you want to argue all day. But like, is that what God actually wants for us to do together with this time that we have here? Don't assume that everyone's toxic and don't neglect to warn people.
Don't just hit eject and disappear and ghost people. You got to say, what's going on. People don't know what you're thinking. Ooh, I need to hear that. Like, looking at this person may or may not be in my house.
I'm like super frustrated and I'm like shooting daggers at them and I'm like, why don't you understand? And they don't understand because I didn't tell them what I was thinking about and I just didn't explain it. It's a me problem. And I'm just so in my head that everybody should know what I want, that they should just automatically do it all. But I'm in a household of people that everybody does what they want to do because that's what they do.
And the spirit of God is working in us to be a family that puts Jesus first and submits ourselves to his will, which is a process and it means that I have to communicate. Well, this is how I think I'm seeing what Jesus will is for us. Am I off base here and being willing to be patient and hold some space for them to express and being willing to be kind and move towards them and serve them and love them whether they deserve it or not. And to give a warning. Don't assume everyone's toxic, don't neglect to warn people.
And then disassociation is not demolition. Disassociation is not demolition. He just says, as for a person who stirs up division, warn him once, then twice. Have nothing more to do with him. Just walk away knowing that such a person's warped and sinful.
He's self condemned. There's a time where you do have to make or hold that boundary, say, hey, I can't, I can't continue to do this with you. But disassociation is not demolition. We don't have to beat the snot out of people with our own opinions in order to justify our feeling of moving away from them. We can say, hey, this is what I, this is what I'm seeing is going on.
I don't know if I'm out of base. Are you on the same track? It seems like you just want to fight about this. I don't want to fight about this. And so I'm just gonna, I'm gonna go do my thing.
And you don't have to tell anybody else about it. You don't have to make sure that you get a public post to get garnered likes so that you have support for your decision. You don't have to like send private messages to the people that you think behind the scenes should be as offended as you are. Like, we don't have to build up this rage case to just disassociate. Disassociation is not demolition.
This is not permission to beat people up.
I don't know, I've seen it once or twice.
God's kindness is meant to lead you to repentance. Later in that same paragraph, he says, God will render to each one according to his works. To those who by patience in well doing seek for glory and honor immortality, he'll give eternal life. But for those who are self sufficient, seeking and do not obey the truth, but obey unrighteousness, there will be wrath and fury. Don't you think God knows?
If God needed your help to execute his judgment, I'm pretty sure you'd have a much clearer directive.
Like the angels come in swords blazing because they know that's what they've been called to do.
I, I don't have that same imperative from Jesus. I think the thing that he told me to do was to love my neighbor as myself.
That doesn't mean we're just doormats and just let it happen all the time. This is in the same paragraph. Do you see that? Remind them to be submissive to rulers. Authority is be obedient, be ready for every good work, speak evil of no one, avoid quarreling, be gentle, show perfect courtesy toward all people.
And in the same paragraph as for a person who stirs up division after warning him once and twice, have nothing more to do with him, those two things are right next to each other. And sometimes we get so fixated on the one, we neglect the other. And sometimes we get so fixated on the one that we neglect the other. And these things go together not because we're smart, but because that's the fruit that the spirit is growing in us.
Act of kindness includes holding boundaries. So I want to encourage you. Where do we need to establish boundaries with others? Or where do we need to hold boundaries with others? There may be some of us that have.
Not that we were like, I just. I want to love him like Jesus. And so I'm just going to let him do all. And it's time to say, hey, hey. This is how I'm seeing it.
Can we come to peace on this? If not, I need to step away. I love you. I'm not trying to blow up your life. I just need to step away.
Where do we need to establish or hold boundaries with others? And where have we built like a flaming wall of disassociation, of demolition? Where have we set up walls of division where it's completely unnecessary?
I tried to draw a boundary, but what I instead did was create an iron curtain that nuclearizes every situation where somebody tries to get close.
Because it's God's unbelievable kindness that reshapes our belief, reshapes how we see the world, reshapes how we see ourselves, reshapes how we see our neighbors to make us kind?
Let's pray.
Lord, there's some ways where the application of a text like this is just so straightforward. And Jesus, there's so many ways where it just goes so much deeper than what we might anticipate. And God, I don't presume to know the hearts and minds of every person in this room, but I thank you so much that you do and that you love each of us. And so, Jesus, I pray that you would bring to mind the application for our engagement with this text today.
Lord, there are some of us whose life is characterized by unkindness, where we're just sour to people all the time, no matter what Lord, forgive me when I've been that person.
And there are some of us who have just tried to be so, so, so nice that we've never stood up for anything.
And Jesus, the model that you set for us is that kindness does take a stand.
Kindness does set boundaries and hold them. And still kindness moves towards sinners with rich grace and mercy and love and washing and forgiveness.
Lord, some of us have just been hurt so much that we've built up these boundaries and reinforced them and reinforced them and weaponized them.
And our hearts have become hard.
And Jesus, you're the one who does heart surgery.
So I pray that you would soften us.
I ask that you would help us to trust you enough and your work in other people to entrust our weakness and our struggle to normal folks that the spirit of God is working in, too.
And God, I know that I'm asking for a bunch of messages in this church and in this community by asking people both to hold boundaries and to be vulnerable, but I don't know what else to ask you for except for what you've told me is good. And so I pray that while we mess it up, that Jesus, you would show yourself strong, that you would administer grace and mercy to each of us as we administer it to one another.
That we would be a people that are characterized by kindness and patience and joy and love.
That's not something any of us can generate on our own. It's something only you can do. So we ask that you'd be at work. It's in Jesus name we pray. Amen.
So I'm just going to continue to give you a couple minutes to seek Jesus and how he's leading you this morning. Here's a couple of questions that we visited while we were going through our conversation today.
I just want to give you a couple minutes to sit in quiet, no notifications, nowhere to be, and just check in with God.
It's.
Our hearts are unsettled and we're really quick to want to rush you.
Thank you. That you take all the time you need. Lord, I pray that we would give you the attention that you deserve.
Would you do your work in us. It's in Jesus name I pray. Amen.
LINKS
Music by Blue Dot Sessions
